Many people are still in shock over Tarja getting fired from Nightwish in the end of October. But, life usually moves on, and here Tarja talks about what happened.
There has been a lot of talk, speculations and rumours after the huge cleanup in the Nightwish-camp. All statements has been from the four remaining members. The reason is simple, Tarja decided to let it all calm down a bit before came with her own comments.
In the beginning of November she decided to lift the vail a little. We did not have the opportunity to go to the press conferanse, where she shared her part with the press. But it’s not really a secret that we are quite close with the band, and that’s why she contacted us directly to talk about it all. We did not plan on making this a huge case here in Scream, the half hour we spoke together the day before she met with the press was more of the private kind, but Tarja wanted us to write a bit about her reactions – since she has a relatively good relationship to Norway, and those who have supported Nightwish.
Norway is the country we have felt most welcome in and been taken best care of of all the countries we’ve been to. I have gotten some really good friends here, and have a lot of good memories from here.
But the others in the band claims that you would rather not go through with the last concert. Isn’t that to disappoint your Norwegian fans a lot?
I did notice what kind of explanation they have put out, but honestly, I had no idea about this gig, and had already made other plans. That is one of the problems that where mentioned in the letter. I never got to decide anything of what we were gonna do. I and Marcelo (Tarja’s husband) has been kept out of all the planning for the past year, which means that we get to know about upcoming concerts so late that it’s difficult to make any plans. I know that I would have disappointed many people by cancelling the Norway-gig, but I also disappointed other people by having to cancel my plans with them.
We won’t dwell any longer on the Norway-gig, but rather focus on the infamous letter, addressed to Tarja. How did she react to that?
I was naturally enough both shocked and surprised. I was shocked that I was left out there without a chance to defend myself. That’s what stuck as the strongest and most bitter reaction. I could have understood the content of it a lot better if I’d been confronted with it face to face, and thereby had a chance to defend myself, and straightened out misunderstandings that lies behind it. I never got that opportunity, and that really hurts me. I didn’t think I deserved such treatment after all of these years.
And are you going to get back with the others by giving just as strong accusations?
No, I am not gonna make this a dirty laundry wash. I chose on purpose not to talk in the period after this event, mostly because I was worried I’d say something I’d regret. At the same time I wanted it to calm down a bit. And I needed some time to realize what had happened.
Do you feel betrayed by the guys – or can you relate to some of their sayings of you betraying them?
Once more, I do register what they’ve been saying. Maybe I did fail them, but then I have not even been realizing it. In a band a lot depends on sticking together. Right after Wishmaster came out the band had a huge crisis. Tuomas wanted to split up the band, God knows why, but he was really far out, mentally speaking. Then we felt that he was failing us, but we chose to support him and help out as much as we could, and Tuomas did get through it. Back then there was no way we’d let such a thing just pass. Now the others are referring to this as a crisis, but none of them has mentioned it to me with a single word. If they had wanted to keep me in the band they would have told me, so that we could find a solution together. And if they had, after that, said that it wouldn’t work out, it would have been a fair way to end it.
Is it Tuomas you are most bitter towards?
Tuomas and I have been friends since we were 10-12 years old, but something happened after the Wishmaster-episode. As his perhaps best friend I was there for him, but I never received as much as a “Thanks”. And after that he has never been the same person. We drifted more and more apart, and what he describes in the letter is just as much his fault as mine. Thinking of the fact that we’re not a band anymore.
Have you spoken to any of the guys after the letter was made public?
Marco and Emppu have called me. But no word from either Tuomas, nor Jukka.
Are you surpised that you haven’t heard from the two latter?
No, not really.
Would you consider contacting them?
No, if they don’t have the guts to confront me it can just stay as it is..
Can you rule out here and now that you’ll ever do anything with Nightwish in the future?
I won’t rule out anything, but it would take quite a lot for it to happen. I don’t wish to be left bitter and abandoned, but I feel betrayed, and my self esteem has been really damaged.
Is that the worst part about this?
Yes, and the fact that I never got to say goodbye to the fantastic audience we have all over the world. They propably feel cut off, and so do I.
Tarja and Nightwish are now history, and the band are in these days searching for a new singer, with many of Tarja’s qualities. There won’t be any dramatic changes around Nightwishs’ style in other words. But the question is, what can we expect from Tarja in the future?
Now I all of a sudden have a lot more time on my hands. I am going to do some solo-shows in the occation of Christmas, and during the winter I’ll work a bit with writing songs to my solo album. I wasn’t gonna release one until after the next Nightwish album, but now it looks like I’m gonna try to record one during next year.
What kind of music can we expect?
I know what I want, and it’s not gonna sound like Nightwish. But it will have certain Nightwish-elements in it, since I’ve grown more and more fond of that kind of music during the past years. So, yeah, there will be some metal influences on the album, but the songs will mostly be built up around my voice, so we’ll see how it turns out.
2005 - Scream - Tarja's Version
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