"A relationship is the best safety net"

Nine years together with Marcelo and a light thirties crisis have made Tarja Turunen think about starting a family.
- There probably never is a good time if you wait for it forever.

Singer Tarja Turunen's home in Kuusankoski has been covered with so much snow that it's been hard to get out. The snow has been shoveled constantly and at times the electricity has been out. Now there's at least light but the floor heater is still acting up.
The 31 year old soprano doesn't still mind the snowbanks. Snow softens voices nicely and Tarja has slept better in the quitness of a small town than in a long time. Also Argentinean manager husband Marcelo Cabuli, 39, is excited about the snow.
- Marcelo relaxes in Finland. Even working is calmer here than in other places. The phones don't ring nonstop.
Marcelo also knows how to equip for the cold. When coming in the man is wearing a wind resistant coat, jeans, proper hiking shoes and a hat with a bobble on top. The appearance is quite Finnish especially when a collage jacket and a waist bag are revealed under the coat.
There's nothing aggressive macho about his behaviour more reserved backwarding. It's easy to believe that on the couple's first trip to the sauna he was wearing shorts.
- Marcelo isn't a typical South-American latino man. Argentineans in general aren't like the cheerful Brazilians but more melancholic like us Finns. There I can be exactly as I am. Perhaps that's why there haven't been any cultural shocks.

A dust rag in hand

Tarja and Marcelo have been together for almost nine years and for five years they've had a second home in Kuusankoski. During the spring the couple moved from a row house to a detached house in need of renovation.
- We redid everything from the floor to the roof. Everytime you got home you needed to pick up a paint brush. We're both spontaneous people: if one had the idea to paint the walls red we did. Now the only place that is unfinished is my work area that should be done at the end of the year.
Tarja laughs that they are always doing something. Or at least Tarja is, Marcelo reputedly sits in front of the computer 24 hours a day.
- But I don't mind, I like to do all the housework. We're both allergic to dust so I pick up a dust rag or put the laundry in the machine as soon as we walk though the door. I enjoy cleaning and you get the dust off better when you do it yourself, Tarja thinks.
She also needs to run everyday either outside or at least on the treadmill. Then the headphones are playing metal or pop and the rest of the world fades far away. There's usually time to watch movies only after midnight.
- Me and Marcelo are quite nocturnal people. Without an alarm clock we'd sleep late in the afternoon. We like to go to the sauna and have friends over during the evenings. We don't go to bars often though and in our home in Buenos Aires there's enough beat of the city without that.
The couple has lived in Buenos Aires for six years. The trip to the Argentinean home is so long that they don't just drop by but stay for weeks at a time.
- That works for me. I like it in Argentina, especially now when I've learned Spanish. People there are more open and the athmosphere is more relaxed than in Finland. I've travelled a lot and become more adaptable but Argentinean culture was still easier to slip into.

Relationship isn't taken for granted

Many of Tarja's friends have wondered how the couple stands eachother so well. Since Marcelo is Tarja's manager they also work together.
- For us combining love and work was the best option. If we didn't travel together, we'd never see eachother. Luckily Marcelo can handle his other work on the road only rarely he has to fly somewhere else for negotiations. And if I miss being alone I can retreat to a book or jogging.
The last time Tarja and Marcelo were apart was a few weeks ago when Tarja travelled to Kuopio for voice therapy. Even a day apart felt hard for the couple.
- Marcelo send three text masseges in that time. We're so used to being together always. We don't take the relationship for granted but somehow it's become this safety net under everything. I can't even remember when we were apart before that.
Sometimes the couple clashes and the conversation can get tense, but the explosion is over in seconds.
- Usually it's about something that hasn't been done. But I can't mope and luckily also Marcelo wants to clear things right away. And when Marcelo decides something there's no point arguing about it. It'll stick.
Tarja and Marcelo met at the change of the millennium when Tarja was still the singer in Nightwish. The band was touring in South-America, Marcelo was in charge of the arrangements and toured with the band. Slowly Tarja noticed that the work companionship had turned into love.
Returning to Finland she felt horrible. Was it real emotions after all and if so was there any sense in starting a long-distance relationship?
- All my previous dreams fell apart. I had imagined setting up a family in Finland but suddenly I was in love with a man on the other side of the world. Luckily Marcelo followed me to Helsinki though I had told him not to and we were convinced of our love.
Tarja was especially taken with Marcelo's ability to be present. After traveling for months with a bunch of men Tarja needed an outside listener and Marcelo seemed to always have time.
- Marcelo didn't suck up to me or try to be better than he was. He was always his true self. Slowly I noticed that Marcelo also had an incridible sense of humour and I realized that our chemisteries match otherwise as well. We're soulmates.
During the first few years the couple spent months apart because of Tarja's touring. Sometimes Tarja had to check from photos what Marcelo's eyes were like.
Despite the fumbles in the beginning neither had the feeling they couldn't trust eachother. They weren't suspicious what the other was doing while the other one was away.
- That would have made being apart even harder. One day we decided that this can't go on. We got married and Marcelo started to tour with the band. After that we've been inseparable. My dramatic split from the band just made us closer.

Christmas at Kitee

A few years ago Tarja was doing a gig in Germany when her stomach started to cramp. She was rushed to the hospital where the cramps were suspected to be from an intestines yeast syndrome.
Now Tarja is on a sugar and flour free diet and is feeling much better.
- I've never really had a sweet tooth but I've reacted to changes with my stomach. Now after a long time I feel great. This year has been wonderful and workfilled but I haven't had even a flu. My skin has also been better and I feel energetic.
That is easy to believe as Tarja glows now when she steps in front of the camera. The tours in Europe and South-America that started during the spring aren't weighing down the small and fragile woman who has a catchy laugh.
Only a composing session for the new album in Sweden and one gig in Germany are ahead this year. Tarja will spend Christmas with her family in her big brother Timo's new home in Kitee. On Boxing Day the couple will head from Tarja's birthplace to Marcelo's home town in Buenos Aires to greet the new year.
- Christmas has always been our family's most important celebration. Our mother's passing a few years ago made a huge hole in our family community and on Christmas the longing emphasizes. Still it's wonderful to see my brothers and father who live on different sides of Finland.
After mother's death Tarja has tried to learn to enjoy every moment. Since you never know what day will be your last.
- I regretted for a long time that I didn't spent more time with my family when mum was sick. Afterwards I've realized that regret is useless. The most important thing is that I'll try to be as good a daughter, sister, wife and friend as I can.

Talking about children

Marcelo has enjoyed Finnish Christmas eventhough the only son of a Jewish father and a Catholic mother is sometimes amused by the Finns attitude towards Santa Claus.
- In Argentina Santas run around in shorts and there's nothing magical about them. In Finland Marcelo has been impressed seeing how Finnish kids believe in Santa Claus. That's a tradition he'd like to keep with his own children.
Yes, the children. Marcelo has hoped for offspring for many years but Tarja has been pushing the brake. Now when she has hit the thirty year mark the resistance is starting to crack and they have discussed the matter seriously.
- I don't know if it's baby fever or what but I've started to pay more attention to the small ones running around me. It feels like every other friend of mine has a belly growing. There probably will never be a perfect time for kids if a start to wait for it. I do want to sing for a long time but I think a family will accompany with that. At least until it's time for the child to settle down for school.
No other signs of the thirties crisis is in sight.
- In my body I notice that things are starting to loosen, I'm not a girl anymore. Luckily Marcelo gives positive feedback daily: he thinks I'm more beautiful now than ever. It would be awful to hear that your bottom looks big, you'd better go to the gym more often.

* Composing music for a Polish film trilogy.
* Calls her husband 'Markku'. "At first I though Marcelo wanted to be an okey guy when he agreed on everything. Later I realized that we're so alike."
* A car fan who relaxes by travelling, diving and tuning her own summer car, a Fiat 600. "My dream is to get a big garage full of old cars. The louder the sound the better the car."